


You weren't just a star

by Thenightdreams



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Angst, Angst and Porn, Cheating, Eventual Happy Ending, Fighting, How Do I Tag, M/M, More tags as I go, half-korean iwaizumi, i don't know whats going to happen to be honest, it's like 2am, so characters and relationships will be added later, so this started as a whim, this is gonna get really sad
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-18
Updated: 2016-09-18
Packaged: 2018-08-15 16:41:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8064001
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Thenightdreams/pseuds/Thenightdreams
Summary: For Oikawa it started out as just mindless payback, a way to cope with everything. After a while it became questionable and curiosity of if this was the right thing or not became a regular question in his head. Then finally there was nothing, no way to cope, no questioning, just a numbing sensation that he always returned to.





	

**Author's Note:**

> So I have no idea if I'll actually finish this because I'm a lazy piece of shit and more focused on my KuroKen fic. But I'm hoping to do something with this but I literally started this as a whim because I had an idea and I'm hoping it keeps going but who knows. Just a side note, I have a huge head canon that Iwaizumi is half Korean (his mother being Korean) So that's a thing in this, enjoy I guess???????

For Oikawa it started out as just mindless payback, a way to cope with everything. After a while it became questionable and curiosity of if this was the right thing or not became a regular question in his head. Then finally there was nothing, no way to cope, no questioning, just a numbing sensation that he always returned to. Guilt of it all was no longer there as he was mindlessly fucked into a wall by Ushijima. The only question that passed through his mind was ‘ _ Why?’  _ which then streamed on more questions of why. 

 

_ Why doesn’t he love me? _

_ Why doesn’t he care?  _

_ Why won’t he even try? _

 

It was painful but at the same time all so numbing. Of course Iwaizumi didn’t know he was cheating on him, and why would he? Oikawa made sure there was no evidence ever left behind. 

 

This all started about two months ago, when they were both laying in a field in the middle of nowhere looking up at the stars. Everything was quiet for both of them but it wasn’t a bad silence it was one of content, but it only took five words for that silence to be destroyed in seconds. 

“Tell your mom about us.” It was a hopeful demand on Oikawa’s part, but what started innocent turned into a disaster that he didn’t even know would happen.

 

“Don’t be stupid.” Iwaizumi replied with a sigh. 

 

“How am I being stupid?” Oikawa asked sitting up to look at his boyfriend in defence. “We’ve been together since third year of high school now we are in our second year of university. How am I being stupid Hajime?” It was rare that he used his boyfriend’s first name, but in this moment he was desperate to know why. To know why his boyfriend wouldn’t tell his mother about them.

 

Iwaizumi sat up with a firm glare. “You know exactly why I won’t do it, you know my mother’s stance on homosexuality. She would cut me off immediately I wouldn’t be able to afford university!” He started raising his voice getting agitated at the setter. “I didn’t get a full ride here like you did.” He growled through gritted teeth.

 

“You don’t know that for sure!-”

 

“And you suggest I risk that!?” Iwaizumi shouted cutting him off. “My mother is not like your mother, my mother is a lot older than yours and on top of that does it ever occur to you how different Korean culture is than Japanese?! It’s not as taboo here as it is in Korea. Do you know how often kids in Korea get put on the streets because they are a disgrace to their family just for being gay! But that’s if the family shows mercy to them! Do you know how many gay kids get beaten and abused just for being gay?! Do you Tooru?!” He was shouting now, he was seeing red. He wanted nothing more than to just leave to walk away like he has always done in the past but it wasn’t that simple, Oikawa didn’t give him a second to leave even if he wanted to.

 

“So what? Our relationship is a disgrace to you now?” The condescending question only fueled Iwaizumi more now. 

 

“If I thought that do you honestly think I would be in a relationship with someone so irrational and so self-centered?!” He knew that what he said would hurt his boyfriend, but he didn’t care anymore, if Oikawa wasn’t even going to be rational anymore he didn’t care. He let out a scoff and grabbed his jacket off the ground. “You know what, whatever. I’m going back home. Think whatever you want, I don’t care anymore.” He finally said walking off to the direction of his apartment with shouts and threats from Oikawa. 

 

A week later Oikawa and Iwaizumi talked less but still managed a somewhat stable relationship but an elephant in the room was constantly there. It was then that Oikawa began to come on to the ace of his team with spite of his boyfriend. Ushijima was more than willing; after all the man had been trying to come onto Oikawa since high school. It was rough feral and done without any questions. Of course it did take some convincing and some flirting for Ushijima to say yes to Oikawa. For Oikawa it was a bit fun stringing Ushijima along making him so mad that he only thought with his cock. To him it was infact a game.

 

It only took two days for Ushijima to crack. It started with subtle touches but by the time they were alone in the locker room changing into daily clothes, the subtle touches became Oikawa stroking Ushijima’s thigh and his ego.

 

“You did so well today Ushiwaka-chan~” Oikawa would say in a sultry voice.

 

Of course the Ace would tense up at the unusual behavior knowing full well the setter was in a relationship with Iwaizumi. But then Oikawa would bend over in a way that Ushijima knew that it was no longer just some out of character compliment that Oikawa was giving him. 

 

By the second day Oikawa was heavily seducing the Ace, his patience growing thin with the man already. Once again they were alone in the locker room with just towels around their waste. Oikawa was going to wait a few moments to advance onto Ushijima again but his ideas were put to an end when the much longer man pushed him into the locker. 

 

“Stop joking around Oikawa, these childish advances need to stop, you know damn well how I feel about you. I don’t have the time to deal with this. Especially when it’s only going to cause tension during practice and nevertheless during a game.” His voice was husky full of lust but also restraint. 

 

“But Ushiwaka-chan~” He said in a singsong voice a smirk pulling at his lips. He pressed his ass against the tanned man letting out a wanton moan when his ass hit the man’s hips. “I’m not joking, I’m glad you noticed my advances. I want you Ushiwaka-chan~ I want that big fat cock in my ass.” 

 

It didn’t take long before Ushijima was pounding into Oikawa and Oikawa continuing to egg him on through moans. That was the first time it happened. The first time Oikawa was with anyone else but Iwaizumi. To him it was exhilarating, exciting but the smallest hint of guilt hit him in the end. This happened about a total of four times in the course of two weeks. By the third week, Oikawa saw less of Iwaizumi, his boyfriend always saying he was busy or too tired anything. At the same time that was happening Oikawa continued to cheat on his boyfriend with the Ace but doubt and questioning started to circle his mind.

 

_ Is this a good idea. _

_ This is bad _

_ I shouldn’t be doing this to Iwa-chan… _

_ He doesn’t deserve this. _

 

But somehow Oikawa still managed to come back each and every time to Ushijima and before he knew it almost two months went by and the painful numbness hit him and now he was just staring at a wall not even moaning as Ushijima ruthlessly thrusted into him and the circulating questions of why began to start. He didn’t even realize he was crying till Ushijima stopped. 

 

“I can’t do this Oikawa.” Ushijima said pulling out with a sigh. He made Oikawa stand up and quickly wiped the tears off the setters face. “God I have wanted nothing more than to be with you for five years and now that I am, I can’t. I have you but your a thousand miles away and it just pisses me off.” His voice was calm but the anger was still there. “I don’t even know why you’re doing this, It’s clear as day that you love him. I’m not someone you can use just to get your anger and frustration out. I thought I was okay with this but truthfully I’m not. I would rather have you to myself and not just be some fuck toy that you use to get your rocks off. I don’t know what’s going on with you and Iwaizumi and honestly I don’t want to know. If you truly have feelings for me which I know- you don’t- you’ll come back to me when you end it with him. But seeing as you don’t have feelings for me, this little thing that’s been going on needs to stop.” He knew Oikawa wouldn’t speak so he just left got himself clean in a shower, got dressed, and left. 

 

Every word that Ushijima said echoed in Oikawa’s head and for quite some time he couldn’t move. He hated to admit it but the Ace was right. He took a deep breath, went to the showers and thought over where he went wrong. He decided that he would need to talk to Iwaizumi to ask him the questions that pondered his head today. In truth, he missed Iwaizumi. He missed how things used to be, and he admitted that a lot of this was his fault but he really did feel like Iwaizumi, didn’t care, didn’t love him, and didn’t want to try. He needed to know why he felt this. 

**Author's Note:**

> Kudos and comments are much appreciated.


End file.
